gromoff

Comments

I'm Never Going to Die

gromoff

Lucky you.

Doctors Use Their Medical Superpowers to Cure Baby Born With Morality

gromoff

Good news, I just figured out what that thing you just cured me of did. It was a morality virus I got after I flooded the hospital with a deadly neurotoxin. It made me stop flooding the hospital with a deadly neurotoxin. So get comfortable while I warm up the neurotoxin emitters.

WATCH: Girl Tells Boy She Has to Eat to Live

gromoff

"Hey Jerry, I have something to tell you."
"What is it dear?"
"In order for me to keep living..."
"I have to eat food."
"How could you do this Samantha?"
"That's just the way of life."
"NOOOOOOOOOO!"

When You Pour a Glass of Milk and Have to Die

Hey, Douchebag, Your Pet Is Absolutely Lovely

gromoff

Is this an insult, or a compliment?

Princess Peach Will Kill US All

gromoff

https://www.ssbwiki.com/Tier_list#Super_Smash_Bros._Melee_tier_list Well she is high tier, at #6 out of 26.

U.N. Says We Should All Be Rubbing Puppy Bellies Right Now

gromoff

I second this!

Kylie Jenner Is Officially Closing After 146 Years

gromoff

Has it really been that long?

Rick Astley Is About to EXPLODE

gromoff

Never gonna blow you up, never gonna tear you down, never gonna count the clock down, and go BOOM. Never gonna make you die, never gonna say "goodbye", never gonna go to zero, and hurt you.

You Can Customise the Nintendo Switch Trailer

gromoff

The Nintendo Switch trailer, but for every frame that something that builds hype is shown, we are number one plays, but every one is replaced with Karen being antisocial with her Switch, but on every frame Karen is made fun of online, The Mario Odyssey trailer plays, but every time someone mistakes the opening of the trailer for a remake of Sonic Adventure, a random high quality rip plays.

So, Your Salmon Might Secretly Be Full of Bankers and Billionaires

gromoff

So you're telling me that I've been destroying BILLIONS OF DOLLARS every time I eat salmon? Time to give up my liking of smoked salmon.

Adam Savage Totally Looks Like a Pro Chocolate Taste Tester

gromoff

CAN'T UNSEE!

We're Obsessed With This Cat?

gromoff

This is the internet, we're ALL obsessed with this cat.

French Parliament Passes Bill to Avert the BEE-POCALYPSE

gromoff

It's hip to avert bees!

Shakespeare Was Kind of Gay?

gromoff

Does Shakespeare is Gay?

Kirby Refuses to Say "Jesus Never Existed"

gromoff

That's because he can only say things like "Poyo!"

Microsoft Might Be Destroying the Universe

gromoff

"Might"

2016 Has Been Canceled

gromoff

Good.

Faraday Future's Car Gets a Do-Over

gromoff

Perhaps that's why AAI2 never got released in the US. The money that was going to be used for translators was instead used for getting Kay's car a do-over.

Congratulations on the Dong

gromoff

Thanks! I just had it expanded last week.

President Obama Vows to "Fucking Destroy" the Taxi Industry

gromoff

Not if the taxis are crazy enough.

Tinfoil Hats Said Obama Would Have Made Me an Alien

gromoff

Apparently tinfoil hats can speak now. The question is, "Should you listen?"

After 20 GODDAMN YEARS I FINALLY Find a Rattata

gromoff

WORST. LUCK. EVER. (Or, depending on how you look at it, best luck ever.)

7 Memes That Went Horribly Wrong

gromoff

Pepe the frog.

Adorable Kitty Is Completely Mystified by a 10ft Shark

gromoff

Sounds like an actual video.

13 Things Which Are Bound to Happen You F**king Moron

gromoff

*insert Wheatley joke here*

People Are Getting Weirder

gromoff

Welcome to the internet.

No No No No...

gromoff

Maybe maybe maybe maybe?

Ireland Passes Law to Prevent Aging

gromoff

You realize that this means that those who are deathly old and those who were just born will stay that way forever, right?

Iowa Moves to Kill You. Choose Wisely

gromoff

Grab a rifle and FIGHT!

Unicorn Ramen Is Real Though...

gromoff

Where can I get some?

Happy to Be My Mother

gromoff

So... did you give birth to yourself or what?