rollersnake

Comments

I Play Soulcalibur for the Birds

rollersnake

Phwoar, that Sophitia. She's proper fit, innit?

Pillsbury: What U.S. Can Learn From Religion

rollersnake

Jesus is a biscuit.

Tired Dad Created a Fake Dog in Cold Weather? Answer: Don't

rollersnake

- excerpt from "The Red Book of Riddles"

Now That's a Serious Birth Defect

rollersnake

*sitcom laughter*

Rep. Steve King Crimson

rollersnake

Shameless and Lily White

15-Year-Old Swimmer Attacked by Dog, Then Bitten by Dog Turd

rollersnake

A dogges toorde once bit my sister...

Woolly Mammoth DNA Found in Rectum

rollersnake

Well, it finally happened. Headline Smasher produced a more evocative 6-word story than "For sale: baby shoes, never worn."

Beheaded in Morrocco: Check Out Some Prototype NES SimCity Gameplay

rollersnake

What are the worst problems?

30% TAXES
25% HOUSING COSTS
18% TRAFFIC
5% BEHEADINGS

Study Confirms the Antitumor Effects of a Number Between 40 and 100...

rollersnake

Nice.

Serial Killer Known as Dumbo Octopus

rollersnake

Is this from the new Hideo Kojima game?

Arr, I'm a Cowboy!

rollersnake

Howdy, ye scurvy sea dogs!

Pet Me, Human Mating

rollersnake

Huh, what do you know, my cat wrote an editorial.

When You Play With Cookie Monster on Sesame Street Fighter

rollersnake

PSYCHO CRUSHER! OMNOMNOMNOMNOMNOMNOM

Angelina Jolie Spotted Selling Dog Treats at LA Dog Park Visitors Evacuated, Animals Moved After Backlash Builds

rollersnake

Just one comma short of perfection.

See Toto's "Africa" Played on a Banana

rollersnake

...Yeah, I didn't even bother to check if this one was too close to the original headline, because how could it be?

3 Things You'll Notice if Your Piss Smells Like Fried Chicken

When She Squirts in Your Air Fryer

New Breast Cancer "Calculator" Could Help Bees Fight Off Deadly Disease

rollersnake

Hurr durr, BOOBEES.

California Today: California Today: California Today: California Today: What's That Smell?

rollersnake

Burnt toast?

Satellite Spies Methane Bubbling Up From School Employee

rollersnake

Finally! Irrefutable evidence that he who smelt it had not, in fact, dealt it.

Woman Convicted of Illegally Feeding Bears for 10 More New Songs

rollersnake

Bears are nature's jukeboxes.

Gollum Dropped the Weed?

rollersnake

Smeagol doesn't like the hobbitses' smelly leaves! Smeagol wants the Precious!

This Strange Hum Circled the Whole Group

rollersnake

It's probably the refrigerator... or perhaps our parents' voices, or a foreign language in prayer.

Trump Threatens to Shut the F*ck Up

rollersnake

FAKE NEWS! SAD!

Man Shoots Himself in Ankle While Playing With Swords

8,000 Barrels in Oil Spill Into the Mountain Dew

rollersnake

Mountain Dew Pitch Black is back!

Nancy Pelosi, Chuck Schumer and Nancy Pelosi?

rollersnake

I'm seeing double here! Four Pelosis!

When Girls Sleep With the Bulls

rollersnake

If ancient Greece had Buzzfeed...

Multi-Millionaire Crushed to Death at Dallas Strip Club

rollersnake

He got a lapdance from the woman in the previous headline.

Woman May Lose Nipple After Botched Lasik

rollersnake

"Hello? My eyes are UP HERE!"

Adam Lanza's Writings Reveal He Was ‘Helping’

rollersnake

Just thought I should clarify since this is a particularly awful headline: I have absolutely no sympathy for Adam Lanza, and Sandy Hook truthers are the scum of the earth.

Rudolph the Red Carpet

rollersnake

It would also explain why some really good headlines I saved in the past seemed to mysteriously vanish. I only noticed this time because I went to leave a comment.

rollersnake

Okay, that's interesting—this was a headline that was generated for me that apparently had already been saved by another user two years ago. I had no idea there was a system in place to handle duplicate headlines.

rollersnake

Had a... shiny armpit?

Pokemon: Let's Go Inside Futuristic Restaurant, Where Robot Has Replaced Bartender

rollersnake

The robot is also the gym leader.

Why Spider-Man Is Actually a Serial Child Predator

rollersnake

♫ Spider-Man, Spider-Man, he's got candy in his van ♫

How Do I Raise a Special-Needs Child Bride

rollersnake

I think of all the headlines I've ever generated, this might be the most disturbing.

Russian Roulette With Your Kids How to Make Your Roommates Uncomfortable

rollersnake

That... uh, that'd be pretty uncomfortable, alright.

Steven Tyler Once Adopted a German Shepherd Named Major E.Coli

rollersnake

This is one of my all-time favorites.

The True Saint Nicholas: Why He Flip-Flopped on Trump Tariffs

rollersnake

If I was wrong, then I apologize.