the great grumbledook

Saved Headlines
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Margaret Thatcher Is Dead Rising
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Charles Saatchi Admits He Deserves to Be Wasted
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Remember, Mario Kart's Arcade Version Lets You Pilot a Mech
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Google Has Built an Actual Fire (OC)
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Secretary of State Convicted of Being Addicted to Makeup
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You Will Not Rise Again
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Venezuelan Women Are Doing Backflips
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Peter Parker's Dead, but Spider-Man Will Live as Woman In prison
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Art Dealer Is Selling the World's Most Fabulous Halo Action Figure
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I Should Be Ashamed
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Etch a Sketch Can't Change His Ways
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2 Men Charged in the Kisser
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Cap'n Crunch Forced to Remove Organs
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Romney on Bin Laden, Calls Obama "Stupid" for Agreeing With KKK on Litter Pickup
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Wild and Bigoted: Former Pink Floyd Frontman Over Israel Boycott
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Nine new species of lion discovered at Ethiopian zoo
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Rep. Ryan: "I Really Misspoke" When I Said Fathead
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Putin Croons in English and Japanese
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Jimmy Fallon Doesn't Want You to Take Harvard-Bound Son's Virginity
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You Will Not Be Shot
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Sad Bear Popped a Hole in Space-Time Continuum
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Mariah Carey Is Probably Itchy
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15 Terrible Love Lessons We Learned From Watergate
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Will Smith Makes Out With His Kids
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Scientists Back Off, Neutrinos Were Not Shot
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Google Threatens to Fuck Up
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You Will Have Supernatural Elements
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This Isn't Just Any Story About Hair
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Bradley Manning's Lawyer Tries, and Fails, to Get Creative
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Yup, Sony Is Still a Baadasssss
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What Heroic Thing Did JC Penney Do After Being Issued Picture of Teen's "Sneaky Nuts"
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Google Is Dead at 44
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Saudi Arabia Really Severed Ties With the Wrong Guy
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This Anti-Abortion Dude Is Awfully Eager to Get Real About Racism
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Snake on a "Sex Jihad" In Syria
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Kid Icarus to Return to Classic Vampire Humping
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Rip Gore Vidal. You Were as Easy as Clicking Your Heels Together Three Times
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Psychologists Propose Horrifying Solution to Higher Ed's Problems
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What You Should All Be FIRED!!! (Except Obama)
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A Straightforward Guide to Stop-And-Frisk Is Hilarious and Heartbreaking