the great grumbledook

Saved Headlines
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President Obama Apologizes for Being 40 Cents Short of Brains
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Fake Antiques Save the Economy
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Now I Remember Why I Created Comic Sans
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Let's Never Watch the Office
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Everything You Never Want to Know
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The Jessica Simpson Concludes 79 Months of Pregnancy With Birth of Son
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Jimmy Fallon Dressed Like a Tool
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MSNBC Host Comes Out to Gays, Saying He Will Forever Be in Color
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Mark Wahlberg Loses His Day Job
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This 15-Year-Old Kid May Have Accidentally Legalized Gay Civil Unions
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Good Samaritan's Selfless Act Ends With No Breaks. She Can't Even Be on Girls
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Anti-Abortion Bachmann Says Women Are Into Greasy-Haired Burglars
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Here's Lady Gaga Supposedly Talking Shit on Tom Cruise: How Fucking Dare You
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Katia Becomes Hurricane Over Puerto Rico
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5-Year-Old Wets Himself During Apprehension
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New "Pikinis" App Helps Creeps Find Your One True Soul Mate
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What Was Kirsten Dunst Doing on All These Pokémon?
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Thanks Nordstrom, Really Needed New Demonic Creatures in My School's Physics Building
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22 Signs You're a Huge Basketball-Playing Raptor?
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Today, We Are Almost Unfathomably Ancient
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That One Thing the Colombian Drug Lords Didn't See It Coming
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He's Speaking. She's Playing. And I'm Cool With It
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Breakdowns: Life Is Complicated? Imagine Having 7 Sexes
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Well, This Is What I Is, Paula Deen Sobs in Tense Senate Showdown
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Rich Man Buys House Next Door
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More True Tales of Taxidermy
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Rescuers Still Hope for Lab-Grown Lungs
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Obama Standing by Decision to Stand Up for War and You
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The Seal Who Killed Bin Laden Not an Ant
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New Mexico Man Says He Is Very, Very Sad
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This Is Why You Shouldn't Want to Live
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Bradley Manning Sentenced to 1,000 More Hours of My Service Dog
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Tyrese Knows What's Up
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This Anti-Abortion Dude Is Awfully Eager to Get a Fair Trial
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Obama: Guantanamo Is Not for Sale on eBay
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Weiner Faces Off With a $2 Laser Pointer
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A Robot Begging for Unforgiveness
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Couple Accused of Sexual Assault Awareness
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Stephen Fry Will Play Uncharted 2 Tonight?
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My Roommate Is a Successful BBQ Pitmaster, Even Better North Korean diplomat