cyris

Comments

Sorry, but Now It Has Become Omniscient

cyris

We're DOOMED!

JJ Abrams Wants to Help People Evade Traffic Laws

cyris

With what? Lots of lens flare?

We Have Two Arms and Two Legs

cyris

OH MY GOD THEY'RE RIGHT!

Rihanna Got Kicked Out of the LHC's Proton Beams?

cyris

Should have brought an umbrella-ella.

The One Where Some Dudes Think They Made It Onto The Internet

cyris

Is that an episode of Friends?

Twitter Troll Isn't Sorry for Giving You Cancer

cyris

That tweet gave me cancer.

The Witches Found the Mysterious Time Traveling Train...

cyris

The one that Doc Brown had at the end of BTTF Part 3?

Not Enough People Are Outraged

cyris

Yellow journalism in a nutshell.

Nigerian Boxer Knocks Out City's Electricity

cyris

Must have been one hell of a punch.

19 Blow Job Openings

cyris

We're hiring!

The Scariest Haunted House You've Ever Eaten?

cyris

A gingerbread house. It's the only kind of edible house that I know of.

My Cat Graced Me With Gross Cupcakes

cyris

Better than dead mice I suppose.

Tips for a Woman Marrying a Ferris Wheel

cyris

1. Don't

Doctor Prescribes Oral Sex to Patient With Back Pain She Suffers From "Ghetto Booty"

cyris

Is this the synopsis of a porno?

U.N. Warns of a 70s Sitcom?

cyris

Oh no! Not a 70s sitcom!

Nintendo's Been Thinking About Ordering Crab or Lobster

cyris

Splatoon sequel?

Obama's Job Aid Plan - $10,000 to Make 33K Burritos

cyris

30 cent burritos?

These Teens Transform Crippling Insecurities Into a Bad Idea

cyris

Every teen ever, really.

10 Life Lessons Kids Learn From the Lack of Oxygen

cyris

I wish you could just choke your kids until they learned things.

You Need to Binge-Watch All of Your Bullshit

cyris

Netflix in a nutshell.

KFC Is Turning Disabled Kids Into Awesome Cyborgs

cyris

KFC: Killer Fighting Cyborgs

All Pigs Go to Jail

cyris

How Animal Farm should have ended.

This Incredible Image of Earth Taken by a Bus

cyris

Was it the Magic School Bus?

My Wife Believes She Is and Isn't Ron

cyris

Schrodinger's Wife?

Here's How to Scare Migrants

cyris

Start building a wall, obviously.

Here, Have a Story About Socks

cyris

I lost the other half of the pair.

Gena Rowlands: I Never Dreamed About Being Seduced by Santa and Abe Lincoln

cyris

That does sound like a dream you might have.

WATCH: This Is Why Squids Will Destroy Humanity

cyris

Splatoon in a nutshell.

My Formerly Fun Friend Has Become a Flamingo

cyris

Alliteration!

Little Old Lady Silences the Room

cyris

You are tearing me apart Lisa!

11 Things You Can't Say Without Sounding Like a Nintendo 2DS Burst Into Flames Inside a Duck's Intestine

cyris

That's...oddly specific.

Here's How to Gain Expertise in Recognizing Torture: Go to Summer camp

cyris

Camping is torture.

Student Suspended From School After Being Decapitated

cyris

"Come back when you have a good head on your shoulders."

38 Studios Lays Off Dozens of People Into the Future's Past

cyris

The unemployment office is actually a time machine.

The Internet Reacts to Secret Super Smash Mouth

cyris

SHREK CONFIRMED FOR SMASH!

This Male Model Will Deliver Justice to Your Butt

cyris

Oh my.

Living Life Like the Japanese, and That Includes Nannies

cyris

I think I'm turning Japanese, I think I'm turning Japanese, I really think so.

The 45 Hottest Jewish Women in Space!

cyris

I didn't know there were even that many.

[UPDATE] Kylie Jenner Got a Gun!

cyris

It's like the Aerosmith song "Janie's Got A Gun", but with Jenner.

The 6 Weirdest Cities People Actually Eat

cyris

I heard Doublebaconcheeseburgeropolis is quite lovely this time of year.