thepenguinking2

Comments

America Has Been Cancelled

thepenguinking2

Good.

Hillary Clinton Has Been Quietly Building a Gaming PC

thepenguinking2

This is going viral and nobody can explain. So this is the headline version of lesbian occulus rift?

People Are Tweeting Awful Things About Crash Bandicoot

thepenguinking2

Woah

People Are Still Tasty

thepenguinking2

Just ask NASA.

Please Give a Shit

thepenguinking2

No.

Transgender People Are Still Preparing for Space Warfare With Missiles, Robot Satellites

thepenguinking2

Landmines, Guns, Battleships, Turrets.

I'm Honestly Not Sure if You Enjoy Being Alive

thepenguinking2

I don't.

Nintendo Is Going to Have Sex

thepenguinking2

This is normal after they stepped into the porn biz.

Donkey Kong Will Change Your Sex Life

thepenguinking2

His coconut gun can fire in spurts.

WATCH: Girl Tells Boy She Has to Eat to Live

thepenguinking2

Plot Twist: It's a mother teaching her son.

Microsoft Could Be Considered Porn Producer

thepenguinking2

So it's stepping into the porn biz. Like Nintendo.

Nintendo Kills the Wii U, at Least 35 Killed, 40 Injured

thepenguinking2

Pathetic. They only killed 35 Wii Us. I would expect more from the company that made them.

Who's Up for a Penis?

thepenguinking2

Don't mind if I do!

Stop Trying to "Summon Demons"

thepenguinking2

No.

Orange Is the New Hitler

thepenguinking2

What a coincidence. The picture I saw for this is of Trump.

Stupid Liberals Can't Read This

thepenguinking2

Uh, I'm a stupid liberal and I can read this.

The 22 Most Sexiest Lasagnas That Have Terrible Storylines

thepenguinking2

That's... well... specific.

You Have a Huge Design Flaw

thepenguinking2

I fucking knew that.

Miley Cyrus Gets Naked and IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT, ASSHOLES

thepenguinking2

I'm sorry...

37 People Trying Not to Eat Bees

thepenguinking2

...But bees are delicious...

Why Are People Pooping

thepenguinking2

Because everybody poops.

BuzzFeed Has a Secret. And It Is Cannibalism

thepenguinking2

10 ways to eat people.

13 Signs You Are a Fucking Disgrace

thepenguinking2

13. Your name is Thepenguinking2.

Watch Justin Bieber Dating So Many SPIDERS

thepenguinking2

Consider the Spider's mating behavior... Bieber's dead.

How to Turn Your Baby Into a GameBoy

thepenguinking2

You throw out the goddamn kid and buy a gameboy on Amazon.

Nintendo hates him!

10 Life Lessons Kids Learn From the Lack of Oxygen

thepenguinking2

"Oxygen = good, no oxygen = bad, lose oxygen = die"

Ted Cruz Terrified of Lesbians

thepenguinking2

In that case, stay away from Occulus Rift.

Should We Stop Throwing Innocent People Off Cliffs

thepenguinking2

...Eh. Down you go, sir! *FLING*

I've Made a Mistake

thepenguinking2

Same.

Finally: LGBT Groups Allowed to Make Perfect Croissants

thepenguinking2

Thank goodness. I've been forced to make these crappy ones for a long time.

Republicans Continue to Insist They're Legit

thepenguinking2

I don't believe them.

Some Good News: God Has Been Cancelled

thepenguinking2

What is a god to a non-believer?

I Want to Die

thepenguinking2

So do I, Headline Smasher. So do I...

Science Has Found the Problem. Everything

thepenguinking2

Something has finally topped the dragon fucking.

The Internet Is Full of Sh*t

thepenguinking2

In other news: Ice is cold.

A Dragon Comes

thepenguinking2

Probably because you fucked it.

New Game Is Stupid

thepenguinking2

I could imagine Heavy from TF2 saying this.

7 Memes That Went Horribly Wrong

thepenguinking2

Doge.

How to Avoid Being Eaten

thepenguinking2

Don't go near animals that eat you. Simple as that.

Bees Are Actually Donuts

thepenguinking2

So here's 21 ways to eat them.