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Voted Headlines
108
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Bear Attempts to Talk About Welfare Fraud
51
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Earth Will Turn Into a Glowing, Animated Jungle
42
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Planned Parenthood ISN'T Just About Farting
77
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Famous Actor Tries to Eat bridesmaid
6
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You Will Never Guess What Michelle Obama Reportedly Does When He's Naked and Quiet
148
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Unclench, Folks: Today Didn't Suck. Actually, Today Was Dress-Up Day for the Penis and Nuts
58
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Cat Thinks His Friend Is a Still a Big Dick
170
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Don't Be Distracted by Their … What?
23
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Sorry, Kids, but Mommy and Daddy Can't Afford to Get Rid of Blood Stains?
5
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It's Time to Make Explosions More Destructive
8
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Chris Brown Didn't "Lose His Virginity" at Age 69
4
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Child Cries After Expecting to Meet With Obama on Easter
9
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Czars Are Cropping Up All Over Your Lawn
113
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It's Time to Make Edible Cat Litter
85
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Pubic Grooming Leads to Anal Probe Nightmare—Again
36
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Choose Your Own Butthole
11
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When Did Our Early Ancestors Figure Out Bras?
115
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Americans Now Too Lazy to Make Farming Sustainable
8
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Middle Schooler Dies After Becoming Beached
82
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Georgia Teen Sues School After Being Targeted by an Air Conditioner Wielding Extortionist
103
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We've Seen the Future, and You're Guaranteed to Eat Gross Things
801
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Fuck This Fucking Week
143
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The Force Is Strong With This Screaming Goat
43
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"Godmother of Cocaine" Gunned Down in the Sandbox at Recess
9
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Bulldog Puppies Learning to Say, We Can't Afford That
193
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Woman Forced Off Plane for Refusing to Convert to Mormonism
3
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Adorable Penguin Couple Has Been Hit by Two Earthquakes
5
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Why Yoko Ono Didn't Didn't Break Up Wedding Party With a Replica Plasma Cutter
5
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Dude Wakes Up and Ready to Go to Work
315
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There's a Goddamn Bird in My Eye
4
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Ousted! Aussie Prime Minister Called a Pizzle
46
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Ann Coulter Tells Us About Our Unplayed Steam Games
72
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The Three Biggest Lies About Celery
24
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I Submit Proof That Cats Are Furry Jerks Who Bombed the Parthenon
111
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Police and Rioters Come Together to Pray the Gay Away
5
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She Was a Giant Eyeball
423
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Donkey Kong Will Change Your Sex Life
99
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Pope Francis Reveals He Once Worked as Nightclub bouncer
9
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This Couple Met, Fell in Love, Started Dating, and Got an "RIP Brian Griffin" Tattoo
73
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God Is Now Doing Full Frontal